A very nice woman in my office made a very off-handed comment yesterday that for some reason lodged itself in my brain and is still on my mind today. Here’s the simplified version of how the convo went down:
Very Nice Woman (VNW - in reference to our company’s new intern): “She is just way too cute for us”
Me (joking): “Hey! I think I should be offended by that haha”
VNW: “Haha noo, you are adorable! She is just one of those 2-dimentional people ::holds up pinkie to indicate how skinny said girl is:: that makes us all look bad”
Now I wasn’t actually offended by her comment, it has just lead to a lot of self and societal reflection (the extent of which I haven’t really delved into since my college sociology and gender study classes) and I thought it might be best to get some of these tangential thoughts down in order to help me clear my head.
I am one of those American women who isn’t actively trying to lose weight. Sure, I am getting back in the habit of going to the gym, and I am trying to cut out processed foods from my diet as much as possible. If I happen to drop 5 or 10 pounds from doing this I would be pleased, but my motivating factor is my health and well-being, not my dress size or the number on the scale. In fact, I think about what it would be like to lose 20 pounds, and at first I am intrigued. I would still be within my healthy weight range, and I would definitely be able to wear certain fashion trends more confidently (I’m talking to you bandeau tops and see-thru lace), but then I think about how none of my clothes would fit properly anymore . . . and my butt. I can’t tell you how much I adore my rear end. I realize that sounds completely conceited and more than a little weird, but there it is. I have a great ass, and I definitely don’t want to lose it.
I started developing curves around the time that big butts became a big deal. Bootylicious was not just a hit song (and eventually a dictionary-defined term), but a coveted compliment. Sweat pants with “juicy” written across the back side became a trend (admittedly, a tacky one, but a trend none the less). And although the whole idea of “fashionable” body specifics is itself a huge problem (particularly since it is usually derived from or applied to attracting a man), hitting puberty at a time when curvy women were “in” did marvelous things for my self-esteem. I love my body. Particularly my lower, thicker half. Sure, we have had our fights (usually under the poor lighting of a dressing room and involving a pair of skinny jeans that looked soooo chic on the mannequin), but then I see my butt and legs in a pair of cut-off shorts and all is forgiven. I’ve also come to realize that absolutely nothing in my life is going to change if I wake up one day and suddenly my thighs don’t touch. If anything, I am going to generate a lot less friction heat in my day-to-day activities and be even more cold-natured than I already am.
I'm so pleased that flares are back on the fashion scene. I never traded them (or my trusty boot-cuts and widelegs) in for these leg-huggers anyways.
I understand that this post sounds like little more than me bragging about my body, and if that bores you to tears, I’m sorry. But these are all the things I wish I could’ve said in response to that comment yesterday (without coming across as the office crazy). And we should all be bragging more. While we’re at it, why is it only “acceptable” to brag about the parts that seem to break beauty standards? I have a great, toned stomach, and big, brown eyes which I also love. And any thin girls out there with thick hair and big boobs should feel free to brag as well! I guess that’s my point. There should be more body love and bragging out there, whether we match the current body standards or not. The new intern is beautiful. She is short and petite and rocks a sundress and tiny ankles like nobody’s business. And the VNW in my office is also beautiful. She walks every day on her lunch break and has some seriously toned legs that I hope she is very, very proud of. But neither of these women “make me look bad”. I look awesome. Especially from behind :)
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